[ it's just tenn's stubbornness catching up with him, really.
that, and the chroma exhaustion, but ryuu has probably figured that out by now.
but the answer to that - just a little bit. tenn's never really been a very heavy sleeper anyway, so when ryuu shifts, he's bound to move a little bit along with ryuu, but it's really when ryuu calls his name that pulls any kind of bigger reaction: a half asleep sound and tenn shifting to bury his face into the warmth of ryuu's shoulder, remarkably catlike. ]
[ it wasn't the reaction he was expecting. suddenly, ryuu isn't sure what he was expecting at all, given the way he goes completely still when tenn draws closer to him rather than pushing himself away. it's partly wonder - ryuu stopping to watch the nuzzle into his shoulder fade back into comfortable silence, and partly ryuu not wanting to disturb him again. tenn is usually so strong, but this isn't something someone can just overcome on willpower and stubbornness alone.
he's a little torn. for one, tenn's sleeping face is so angelic it actually makes his chest feel all weak on the inside. and he's always wanted tenn to lean on him this way, but maybe, well... maybe the circumstances put a spin on it he can't entirely be happy about. for him, chroma isn't too difficult a thing to adapt to, but for someone like tenn?
ryuu's gaze flicks from his tired face resting against his shoulder down to his hand, pale, pretty fingers loose by his leg. his heart starts to pound a little.
sometimes the limit manifests in an almost-perfectly timed fall into an idolish7 member's arms while trying to make his way to their concert hall, but rarely does it manifest like this--
yeah, tenn's definitely blissfully unaware of the way ryuu is having a kind of mini-crisis right now, even with his head half tucked into the crook of ryuu's neck and hand hanging slack enough that the end of his his fingers are brushing gently against the top of the couch, near enough to ryuu's leg.
another minute shift, like tenn's trying his best to curl up into the most comfortable, the warmest position he can find without it being too awkward.
it's enough for his hand to bump against ryuu's leg, unintentionally.
[ it takes almost a full minute of steeling and mental deliberation to bring ryuu to the point where he feels like - he should, right? as much as he shifts naturally with tenn's attempts to curl into him, eventually hitting that sweet spot where nothing feels too awkwardly positioned, ryuu can't get the thought out of his mind that there's a reason why tenn is acting like this. it takes a bit of the shine away from the moment, the giddiness at having that flossy crown of his tucked so close to his neck.
concern pushes up through nervousness, making him swallow whatever apprehension he feels. they're generating a little chroma like this, but it won't be enough to make a difference, he's sure. so very gently, almost having to hold his breath to do so, ryuu shifts his arm closest to tenn and reaches for his hand.
his fingertips crawl and push themselves between the divots of his knuckles, and with a careful flex, he laces them together. ]
[ it takes a while, a moment where tenn doesn't react visibly, other than the slight furrowing of his brow.
but then,
(ryuu's hand is warm.)
the warmth is what makes tenn curl his fingers around where ryuu's laced their fingers together, squeezing lightly, and it's also the warmth that causes him to stir just a little bit, blinking up at ryuu through half-closed eyes. ]
... Ryuu?
[ it's soft, tired,
vulnerable
but to his credit, tenn doesn't immediately spring away from where he currently is, and he hasn't let go of ryuu's hand either, so. ]
[ there's a moment where ryuu is hyper aware of all the little shifts in tenn's expression, his subtle body language. it's only because he's looking, because he cares about how far is too far in a situation like this. normally he's a bit more overt in his affections, but he's talked about it a couple times here - what it means to share energy like this. it's all too easy for him to give his chroma, but it goes both ways.
he can give everything he has, but if the other person finds it difficult to accept, shouldn't he find a way to measure himself? (like tenn always tells him.)
only the sound of his name gets him flickering a glance down, somewhat guilty.
he doesn't let go either, though. ]
...sorry.
[ he really can't get his heart to calm. ]
Does that feel okay?
[ the question is soft and meandering, wondering if tenn will even verbally answer. ]
[ ryuu's always been open with his affections, and for someone like tenn, who's used to isolation and not so much to overt physical displays of affection, it can get overwhelming at times.
not this time, though. where their hands meet, tenn's slender fingers twined with ryuu's larger ones, is a warm spark, a pleasant feeling that probably is from the chroma, the energy being shared, enough that tenn unconsciously seeks out more of it, his grip tightening just minutely, probably enough for ryuu to feel it, the position of their hands shifting slightly.
tenn blinks the sleep out of his eyes, once, twice, just enough to look up at ryuu and catch the guilt painted over his features.
(....... maybe it's the drowsiness, but tenn doesn't quite know how to feel at that look.) ]
...... Did I fall asleep?
[ another rhetorical question, not quite acknowledging ryuu's question or apology - because tenn has always been good at deflecting.
but the way tenn still clutches at ryuu, doesn't make a move to disentangle himself from ryuu's hold on the couch, is telling. it's fine. they can stay like this. ]
[ tenn's reactions to him are more than ryuu expects, even when he's still lulled to that twilight place between wakefulness and sleep. and that in and of itself almost makes him feel worse, to know that his guard is down so much. how long had it taken to fully deplete that much? did he just not notice? ryuu almost can't be happy for the return gesture, though he doesn't let go of his hand - not to save his life.
his fingers tighten instead, a little squeeze as if he's trying to punctuate something he hasn't actually said yet. it's not as though it's tenn being bright-eyed and sharp-tongued, telling him to practice restraint.
it's all different. ]
You did. Tenn... it's probably your chroma, isn't it?
[ silence, for a moment, and then grudgingly, tenn nods, a brief admission of defeat, with his shoulders slumped and curling halfheartedly into the warmth of ryuu's body because it's the only thing that's kind of keeping him more than conscious right now. ]
... Maybe. [ no use in going for an outright denial or trying to play it off like it's less serious than ryuu makes it out to be. ryuu has no restraint sometimes when he comes to his affection and his concern, but it's one of the things that makes him so ryuu that tenn can't find it in himself for deny or deflect.
........ oh well. ] I may have underestimated how much I needed.
[ somewhere, buried inside that statement, is some kind of an apology. some kind.
[ that answer gets ryuu to deflate some, worry abating in a steady trickle. leave it to tenn to make it sound so blase that he actually feels comforted by it, though it helps that he's not trying to push him away either. his heart feels lighter than it should, he knows, but he can't help the feelings that bubble up around it, gentle and buoyant.
tenn pressing in close, even as an afterthought to the weakness ryuu knows he doesn't want to show, makes ryuu finally smile again. the tilt of it is so obvious - an unspoken answer to his unspoken apology. ]
That's easy to lose track of, if you're not thinking about it!
[ it's so tempting to tip the balance just like that, to touch more and offer up everything he has, but ryuu stays as he is, chin lowering. ]
If you don't mind staying like this a while, you should start to feel better soon.
W-Well... ah, I'm actually not bad at managing my chroma!
[ though it's obvious it's just because he's naturally affectionate and would find it easy enough to give the shirt right off his back if need be, he only seems to realize how it sounds after the fact. quickly, his grip tightens in reassurance, as if that wit managed to shoot right through his poor heart.
so, business as usual. ]
Only because it's something your body needs here! Just like food, or water!
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that, and the chroma exhaustion, but ryuu has probably figured that out by now.
but the answer to that - just a little bit. tenn's never really been a very heavy sleeper anyway, so when ryuu shifts, he's bound to move a little bit along with ryuu, but it's really when ryuu calls his name that pulls any kind of bigger reaction: a half asleep sound and tenn shifting to bury his face into the warmth of ryuu's shoulder, remarkably catlike. ]
no subject
he's a little torn. for one, tenn's sleeping face is so angelic it actually makes his chest feel all weak on the inside. and he's always wanted tenn to lean on him this way, but maybe, well... maybe the circumstances put a spin on it he can't entirely be happy about. for him, chroma isn't too difficult a thing to adapt to, but for someone like tenn?
ryuu's gaze flicks from his tired face resting against his shoulder down to his hand, pale, pretty fingers loose by his leg. his heart starts to pound a little.
should he chance it? ]
no subject
sometimes the limit manifests in an almost-perfectly timed fall into an idolish7 member's arms while trying to make his way to their concert hall, but rarely does it manifest like this--
yeah, tenn's definitely blissfully unaware of the way ryuu is having a kind of mini-crisis right now, even with his head half tucked into the crook of ryuu's neck and hand hanging slack enough that the end of his his fingers are brushing gently against the top of the couch, near enough to ryuu's leg.
another minute shift, like tenn's trying his best to curl up into the most comfortable, the warmest position he can find without it being too awkward.
it's enough for his hand to bump against ryuu's leg, unintentionally.
(unlike most of his calculated fanservice)
(go on. it's there.) ]
no subject
concern pushes up through nervousness, making him swallow whatever apprehension he feels. they're generating a little chroma like this, but it won't be enough to make a difference, he's sure. so very gently, almost having to hold his breath to do so, ryuu shifts his arm closest to tenn and reaches for his hand.
his fingertips crawl and push themselves between the divots of his knuckles, and with a careful flex, he laces them together. ]
no subject
but then,
(ryuu's hand is warm.)
the warmth is what makes tenn curl his fingers around where ryuu's laced their fingers together, squeezing lightly, and it's also the warmth that causes him to stir just a little bit, blinking up at ryuu through half-closed eyes. ]
... Ryuu?
[ it's soft, tired,
vulnerable
but to his credit, tenn doesn't immediately spring away from where he currently is, and he hasn't let go of ryuu's hand either, so. ]
no subject
he can give everything he has, but if the other person finds it difficult to accept, shouldn't he find a way to measure himself? (like tenn always tells him.)
only the sound of his name gets him flickering a glance down, somewhat guilty.
he doesn't let go either, though. ]
...sorry.
[ he really can't get his heart to calm. ]
Does that feel okay?
[ the question is soft and meandering, wondering if tenn will even verbally answer. ]
no subject
not this time, though. where their hands meet, tenn's slender fingers twined with ryuu's larger ones, is a warm spark, a pleasant feeling that probably is from the chroma, the energy being shared, enough that tenn unconsciously seeks out more of it, his grip tightening just minutely, probably enough for ryuu to feel it, the position of their hands shifting slightly.
tenn blinks the sleep out of his eyes, once, twice, just enough to look up at ryuu and catch the guilt painted over his features.
(....... maybe it's the drowsiness, but tenn doesn't quite know how to feel at that look.) ]
...... Did I fall asleep?
[ another rhetorical question, not quite acknowledging ryuu's question or apology - because tenn has always been good at deflecting.
but the way tenn still clutches at ryuu, doesn't make a move to disentangle himself from ryuu's hold on the couch, is telling. it's fine. they can stay like this. ]
no subject
his fingers tighten instead, a little squeeze as if he's trying to punctuate something he hasn't actually said yet. it's not as though it's tenn being bright-eyed and sharp-tongued, telling him to practice restraint.
it's all different. ]
You did. Tenn... it's probably your chroma, isn't it?
no subject
[ silence, for a moment, and then grudgingly, tenn nods, a brief admission of defeat, with his shoulders slumped and curling halfheartedly into the warmth of ryuu's body because it's the only thing that's kind of keeping him more than conscious right now. ]
... Maybe. [ no use in going for an outright denial or trying to play it off like it's less serious than ryuu makes it out to be. ryuu has no restraint sometimes when he comes to his affection and his concern, but it's one of the things that makes him so ryuu that tenn can't find it in himself for deny or deflect.
........ oh well. ] I may have underestimated how much I needed.
[ somewhere, buried inside that statement, is some kind of an apology. some kind.
he still doesn't let go. ]
no subject
tenn pressing in close, even as an afterthought to the weakness ryuu knows he doesn't want to show, makes ryuu finally smile again. the tilt of it is so obvious - an unspoken answer to his unspoken apology. ]
That's easy to lose track of, if you're not thinking about it!
[ it's so tempting to tip the balance just like that, to touch more and offer up everything he has, but ryuu stays as he is, chin lowering. ]
If you don't mind staying like this a while, you should start to feel better soon.
[ clearly, ryuu doesn't mind. ]
no subject
[ and there it is, tenn's usual sparkling wit fired back almost seamlessly pretty much the main sign that he's feeling--
well, better, even if he's not at 100% just yet. these kind of things don't happen immediately, after all.
absently, like it's a kind of afterthought, tenn shifts his hand again - a light, barely there squeeze. ]
no subject
[ though it's obvious it's just because he's naturally affectionate and would find it easy enough to give the shirt right off his back if need be, he only seems to realize how it sounds after the fact. quickly, his grip tightens in reassurance, as if that wit managed to shoot right through his poor heart.
so, business as usual. ]
Only because it's something your body needs here! Just like food, or water!
[ or tea and cake! ]
...speaking of! Were you still hungry?